Dancing in Midlife Tune

Influence of Ordinal Position on Children

By admin, October 6, 2007 4:21 am

I am the eldest of 3 siblings. I got a younger sister who at this time is having same age as me. (Gonna change mine in few days. hmmmm). Our youngest is a boy –which i think complicated more the hardship my mom has to go through.

As the eldest child — I have so many questions on why was i dealt that way when i was still a kid and why my younger sister is treated this way and my brother that way. My questions can’t be answered my mom. The “favoritism” is not so obvious but i have clearly seen it — the 3 of us were reared differently as we grow up with different attitudes and outlook in life.

I come across a reading that made me understand (now) in a way that the ordinal position of kids in the family matters in the formation of outlook in one’s life.

FIRST BORN:

- Are achievement oriented
- Are more dominant
- Receive more physical punishment
- Are allowed to show more aggression to siblings
- Have stronger consciences, are self-disciplined and inner directed
- Are more socially anxious
- Are prone to feelings of guilt
- Identify more with parents than with peers
- Are more conservative
- Are subject to greater parental expectations
- Begin to speak earlier in life
- Demonstrate higher intellectual achievement
- Plan better and experience fever frustrations

MIDDLE CHILDREN:

- Have more demands on them for household help
- Are praised less often
- Receive less of parent’s time
- Learn to communicate and be adaptable
- Are less stimulated toward achievement
- Are more difficult to characterize because of variety of positions in the family

YOUNGEST CHILDREN:

- Are less dependent than firstborn children
- Are less tense, more affectionate, and more good-natured
- Tend to identify more with peer group than with parents
- Are more flexible in their thinking
- Are popular with classmates
- Have fewer demands placed on them for household help

ONLY CHILDREN (ONLY-CHILD):

- Resemble firstborn children
- Are more mature and cultivated
- Experience great parental pressure for mature behavior and achievement
- Demonstrate superiority in language facility
- Rarely, develop into stereotype of spoiled, selfish child
- Often enjoy a rich fantasy life as a result of isolation)